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I have collected a few of these 'Laws of Combat' from various sources. Some are amusing, some are very true! If you have any to add, please feel free to email me, and I will add to this list as often as possible.

Hevy Duty

"Hevy Duty's Laws of Combat"

  • You are not Superman.
  • If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.
  • Don't look conspicuous-it draws fire.
  • When in doubt, empty your magazine.
  • Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are.
  • Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
  • If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
  • No plan survives the first contact intact.
  • All 5 second grenade fuses burn down in 3 seconds.
  • Invariably, the blast radius of a hand grenade is one foot greater than your jumping radius.
  • It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.
  • Try to look unimportant because the enemy may be low on ammunition.
  • If you are forward of your position, the artillery will fall short.
  • The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.
  • Teamwork is essential, it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.
  • The important things are always simple.
  • The simple things are always difficult.
  • The easy way is always mined.
  • The crucial round is always a dud.
  • If you are short of everything except enemy, you are in combat.
  • If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
  • The Quartermaster only has two sizes-- too small or too large.
  • Incoming fire has the right of way.
  • When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemey.
  • Friendly fire isn't.
  • If the enemy is in range--SO ARE YOU!
  • If you can't remember, the claymore is always pointed towards you.
  • Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
  • No combat ready unit ever passed inspection.
  • Things that must be together to work, usually can't be shipped together.
  • Radio's fail as soon as you need fire support desperately.
  • Anything you do can get you shot-including doing nothing.
  • Tracers work both ways.
  • The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
  • Make it tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.
  • If you take more than you fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share of objectives to take.
  • When both sides are convinced that they are about to lose, they are both right.
  • A 'sucking chest wound' is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
  • Recoilless rifles--aren't!
  • If at first you don't succeed, call in an airstrike!
  • Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you.
  • There is NO such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
  • A Purple Heart just proves that you were smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
  • Professional soldiers are predictable, but the world is full of amateurs.

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